Have a chat with yourself this Valentine’s Day.

Now I am not suggesting that you hear voices however it is interesting to be aware of the internal chatter that goes on inside your head.  Are you your own best friend or a mean pain in the ‘a’ who puts yourself down?

A great deal of the dialogue around this centres on the concept of ‘loving yourself’ and while I believe this is true, it can sound a bit hokey for some people and over the top. Like you are ‘up yourself’ somehow; not a great approach to an important concept.

So I like to think of it as being your own cheerleader or your own best friend, someone who is all of these things:

Encouraging
Supportive
Helps you find solutions instead of wallowing in despair with you
Helps you find things you like about yourself instead of pointing out all the things that are wrong
Makes you feel good about yourself
Enhances you rather than brings you down
Gives you confidence
Nurtures you
Gives yourself a break
Is kind to you

So in reading the list above, do you think you are this way to yourself? Are you on your own team? Or are you the opposition helping to knock yourself down?

And if you are not sure, just take a few days and listen to what you say to yourself.

Is it like this…

“OMG my skirt is so tight, soon I’m going to be huge.”
 
“I can’t believe I just ate all of that, you idiot, don’t you have any self control?”
 
“Everyone else can seem to do it, why can’t I?
 
“I’ve lost a bit of weight, but I still look terrible.”

Imagine saying this type of thing to your real life best friend who is trying to lose weight…

“You may have lost some weight but you’re still fat though, you have such a looong way to go.”
 
“You moron, did you eat the whole tub of ice cream? What a loser.”

No way! Seems outrageous right?  You wouldn’t dare say it to anyone else, so why then would you say it to yourself? I think we are all programmed to be negative because everyone does it.  It just seems normal.

Every bad thing you think or say about yourself though is holding you back from your full potential and just makes it more difficult to get to where you are trying to go.

Starting now, listen for anything you think about yourself that is not in the spirit of being your own best friend or cheerleader and stop and replace it with something positive. Find things you like about yourself, it doesn’t even have to be weight related and remind yourself of these often. Try these out for size:-

I might not be where I want to be right now, but I’m on my way and that’s exciting!”
 
“I have great fashion sense and can make myself look good no matter what size I am!”
 
“I love the way I do my make up.”
 
“I’ve lost 5lbs already and that is cause for celebration!”

“I may have eaten that whole packet of cookies yesterday and while it made me feel totally wired and out of control, I know I don’t want to feel like that any more, so I will find a better way.”
 
“That skirt may not fit now, but that’s ok, I will find one that does and put it away for when I do lose weight.”

See how much more kind and gentle you are being to yourself? It is much easier to succeed when you have encouragement along the way, not someone telling you off along the way.

So starting this Valentine’s Day, find every way you can you cheer yourself along, pom-poms, high kicks and all!

Are you ready to lead the YOU team???????

Kristy xxx

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